YOYOYO I WAS RELEASED FROM TORTURE CAMP TODAY AT 1PM!!! AHM NO LONGER A PRISONER OF WAR!! OH AND HAPPY BARFDAY TO MAH DAD!!! :DDD Ate at a dim sum place for supper <3




Dear readers, I have something very serious to tell all of you. Yesterday, I was diagnosed with a disease, a fairly common disease that affects approximately 36% of the world's population. Now, please don't get your knickers in a knot. I was contemplating how I should break the news to all of you, and that is why, in my dilemmic state, I chose not to talk about it yesterday. In fact, I was so traumatized and shocked that I was at a loss for what to do, which is why I did not even post anything at all. To be honest, I have always prided myself as a squeaky clean partial-germphobe, and never in my life have I ever thought that I would be a victim of a disgusting disease-y infection (a bacterial infection no less!). Hence, it is with a heavy heart that I let all of you know, that I have.....dental caries. Yes, you read that right, TOOTH DECAY. Upon hearing the news from my tooth doctor (who may or may not be a quack), I was aghast, vexed, dismayed, and lachrymose all at once. It took all of my willpower to force-close my tear ducts and put on a pretentiously cheerful demeanor. Oh, the woes of being a strong independent adolescent! Nevertheless, I have decided to take things in my stride and face this horrifying piece of news with optimism and positivism. Albeit 99.9% of tooth doctors around the world will tell you that dental caries will stay with you for life (emphasis on FOR LIFE), I am a firm believer of natural remedies, and that is why I will be going on a high-calcium-high-vit.D diet from now on. My low-carbohydrate diet whose main goal is to reduce my weight by 10kg will have to wait. Of course, introducing such a novel and unique diet to my ol' body has its consequences. Studies have shown that excessive vitamin D will increase the risk of heart disease and the whatnot especially in females, but I would rather risk that than face my repulsively atramentous shitcaries every day of my life until my teeth drop from old age. So, darling readers, please think of me when you eat your grains (did I mention that grains -rice- are not included in my diet?) and other junk shit, just like how you would think of starving African children. Savour every bite of your mapo tofu rice, and appreciate how the chilly yet sweet chocolate ice cream feels on your tongue. You never know, one day, you might just end up like me, a sad reminder of what will happen to you once you lose yourself in the wonderful dimension of candies and edible junk.

Goodbye, cruel world.