OMG I FEELL SO SADD I HAVEN'T UPDATED MAH BABY BLOG IN 72738826 YEARS!!!!!

RECRUITING!!!! RECRUITING!!! If you have a passion for cooking, if you love to cook or if you can cook, join us. JOIN US IN THE COOKING CLUB!

OMG I suddenly thought about PE. I accidentally hit Park's head while tossing the frisbee to Nicole!!!! Sorry Park!!!!!!!!!!

Went to the Gold Rush: Treasures from Ukraine exhibition!! It was quite fun but the last section sucked since they ran out of cool Ukraine treasures and just displayed Singapore gold.

My favorite artefacts are firstly, the moldy old beehive helmet and the ratty ol' comb with missing teeth.

DON'T STOP READING OR YOU WILL BE CURSED FOR LIFE. THIS IS THE HAUNTED STORY OF HOOFGANG JAMADEUS GOZART:Once upon a time, in a space continuum not too different from ours, there lived a 15-year-old boy named Jamadeus Gozart. His Favourite piano piece was Mozart's K545, and he adored everything related to Mozart. Jamadeus lived in a prison block located on the summit of Bukit Timah hill. For some reason, this prison housed innocent 15 year olds like him, who were kidnapped from their parents and forced to eat toxic vegetables and rat meat. The only difference between these kids and Jamadeus was that Jamadeus had no parents. He had no name, no family, and no friends. His life was like a dream, without a definite beginning and devoid of all substance. One day, whilst walking back to his non-existent room, he encountered a boy. A boy named Jeremy Goh. Jeremy had everything Jamadeus ever dreamt of. Friends, twin sisters, and a mega-cool haircut. Plus, they looked exactly alike. Jamadeus had found a purpose in his otherwise purposeless life. And that was, to steal Jeremy's entire existence...........

Fact 1: 2 days later, Jeremy was reportedly seen entering his cell at 7pm. When asked, he insisted that he was in the bandroom, playing the trombone and only retired to his room at 7.30pm.

Fact 2: Jeremy was spotted by a credible source at the stairwell opposite the prison's bridge. However, other sources report that once again, he was playing his trombone in the band room.

You be the judge. Does Jamadeus really exist, and will Jeremy live? LIKE AND SHARE DIS POST OR GOZART'S POOP WILL FIND IT'S WAY INTO YOUR MOUTH.

I'm in love with the Nutcracker Suite! I'm in love with Tchaikovsky! I'm in love! I'm in love! I'm in loooooove!

I'm not a feminist, but I feel indignant whenever I see how females are mocked for what they are! You're female? MAKE ME A SANDWICH. Female? OMGG YOU'RE NEVER GONNA WIN AN ARGUMENT WITH HER. What you're female? GO BACK TO THE KITCHEN. UGH STOPPEEEEEEEEEET. 1) I would rather eat crackers instead of sandwiches. 2) I have lost arguments before. 3) I HAVE A BEDROOM AND A TOILET AND A LIVING ROOM AND THEY'RE ALL MINEEEEEEEE.

HALP. I haven't started on my LA essay!!!! *commeets sweeside*

LOL Read Jeremy's blog post about dumb Yugih!!!! His/her past was so scary!!!!!!!!! AND I REALLY SAW JEREMY'S DOPPELGÄNGER!!!! OMG OMG AND I WASN'T THE ONLY ONE. JEREMY IS GONNA DIIEIEIEIEIIEIEIEIEIE. Die Meistersinger!

I feel so mad >:( I searched long and hard for the original Nutcracker Suite score by Tchaikovsky and was all set to learn it when suddenly............ I REALISED THAT JOSHUA PLAYED THE FIRST MOVEMENT BEFORE. Now I can't learn it because everyone will compare me to fat talented Joshua whose fingers move so quickly that they set themselves on fire. OMMA OMMAAAAA!!!!! I love the story of the "OMMA", originally told by Hyun Hee. One day, I will tell it to you my dear readers <3

I feel bad for reusing old photos but I REALLY DIDN'T TAKE ANY NEW ONES. Ethan chasing after his one and only true love Ili <3

HEEHEE TODAY WAS SUCH A CRAZY DAY.

During our 2 hour lunch, everyone went to watch the piano recital. The seniors were super good!!!!!!!!! Sat next to Peilin when she suddenly had a coughing fit and ran out of the Lt. RIP.

After that Mojojolene and Jieying and I went to the oasis. HAHAHAHAHAA JIEYING FOUND A SICK BOOK ABOUT A SLAVE WOMAN. We started reading it together and it was super gross!!!! Apparently, the guards would put blocks on the slaves' shins and break them if they tried to escape!! And ugh the author is so stupid!!!!!!! She didn't even know she was getting r@p3d!!!! WHICH REMINDS ME, MY TWO DEAR FRIENDS ARE PERVERTS. When they read THE scene, they stared at it so intently that I thought their eyes were gonna pop put of their heads :6 LOL AND WE KEPT LAUGHING AT ALL THE OLD CHINESE NAMES. LIM AH FOO AND AUNTIE MOI AND AUNTIE LO

And OMG The bandroom stank like f*** today and it was so bad that I thought I was gonna puke. But I think the worst smell comes from the junior who looks like an egg yolk!!!! In fact, the smell IS that of an egg yolk. But mixed with farts. AND IT WAS HONESTLY SO SUPER GROSS THAT I NEARLY DIED. FO REAL. GURL, PLEASE PUT ON SOME DEODARANT. A SWEATY GECKO IS ENOUGH.

Ugh I hate this dumb asscrack boy who keeps stealing my seat at Chinese tuition!!!! >:( He's so annoying and he keeps acting cool I feel like punching him!!!! >:((((((((((

Pics 4 2d@y

OMG I DID NOT POST THE POST TITLED "WAD I LIKE"!!!!!!! I can't believe I only noticed it now >:(((((((

BAHAHAHAHHAHA OMG I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING. Last night, I dreamt of fat Jolene eating non-stop!!! SUCH A FUNNY SCENE IS INDESCRIBABLE. I literally laughed myself awake. Fortunately Farah didn't wake up! :9

Did ABtS Assay today! The colour of the ABtS radical solution is beautiful! Unfortunately I had to leave while myself and arina were measuring the absorbance of the trolololox solution.

OOoooOoOoOoOoOoo!!!!! I'm so super sleepy. My piano lesson just ended and I feel so tired. Goodnit

Today was an average day! Terrible things happened but fortunately good things happened too, which is why they neutralized each other and the day became average!

My day began at 4am. As usual I had agonizingly painful leg cramps but this time I said "OUCH" in my dream (or so I thought) but I actually said it aloud and accidentally woke Farah up :'(( I'm sorry dear Farah!!! I deprived her of an hour's worth of rest ;'((( I honestly think that boarding is haunted!!! This is the 5th or 6th time I'm getting leg cramps in the middle of the night >:(((( and I don't get them at home! PRISON SUX

I got scolded by so many teachers today :'( I felt quite sad because..... STICKS AND STONES CAN BREAK MY BONES AND TRUTH BE TOLD, WORDS HURT TOO. But kind Lee Ping Guan was very nice! He stared at my artwork and went "WAAAAAAA WAAAAAAAA SO NICE AH" I mean, I know my artwork isn't nice and even if he was joking, it's still a very kind thing to say! He made my day better :) Dear humans, please try to be nicer when you talk to others. Even the smallest sentence can make a person's day!

I love how Jieying sings this song <3 AND SLOTH IS RETARDED!!! :'((((

I m goin tell confesses u, wat I like n why. Is a seecretz lololololtotorlol !!!!!!! :))))) I like Justin bieberszz <3 cos he is like hot.

OMG CHIN IS SO OBNOXIOUS, TO THE POINT THAT I FEEL LIKE PUNCHING HIM. OMGOMG HE NEVER FAILS TO OFFEND ME SERIOUSLY JUST SHUT YER HAIRY TRAP DISGUSTING MIDGET MAN. AS EXPECTED, MOST MIDGETS ARE APPALLINGLY ARROGANT AND BASTARDLY. UGH *vomits blood*

YAAAAAWwwwAaWw I feel so tired and dead omG I sti haven't done my IH outline and physics graph yaawwwwwadkwnd I'm gonna ride the hornbill and travel back to MAH home >:((((

I tried to propagate the message "CHINNY SUX" to everyone, but surprisingly I didn't need to! Everyone I encountered said "I KNOW RIGHT!!" and went on to elaborate on his shortcomings. Ahhh Its like an anti-chin alliance with no leader. Which reminds me, I have to ask ChanSY if I can create a cooking club!

Cooking Club:
Objectives: To create 3 recipes by the end of the year per person.
Events: A yearly buffet session where anyone can come to savor and taste our lovely creations.
Faculty advisor: Khoo Lilin, owner of Le Chandelier.
Meet-up days: Mondays, 4.30-6.30pm

Don't you think it'll be fun?? :9 Many people have already agreed to join should the club really be formed, so please consider it too, dear readers! :)

DISSECTED A PIGGY EYEBALL TODAY. I think I'm a naturally talented surgeon because I managed to successfully extract the iris beautifully!! Even Myself said it was beautiful!!!!! I FEEL SO HAPPY CHOPPING STUFF IS THE ONLY THING IM GOOD AT

PICS

Aloha mi amores! If I had one dollar I would slot it into a gachapon machine instead of the washing machine in prison. DONT WASTE YOUR MONEY ON THAT CLANKY OLD CLOTHES-SPINNER!!!!!

Yaaaaaaaawww I'm so boreD. HALP Our IH assignment is due in 12 hours time!!!!!!!!!! Lucky Fat Jolene is watching batman :6 I hope she doesn't get shot

I'm designing the band ticket!!! Please buy from me it's super duper cheap only $3 ;'(((((((

I HAD A GREAT TIME EATIN AND PLAYING WITH EVERYONE<3

Hallo baby readers!!! It feels like I haven't posted in 219629379127 years!!! ;'((( DID YOU ALL MISS ME?!?!? I HOPE SO.

I'm currently on my way home to see my cousins!!! Apparently, the not-annoying one has started playing TF2!!! YAY We'll have fun tonight!! And piano lesson just ended :9 I actually like playing the piano, but I dislike studying all those weird Italian terms :6 Mah lovely teacher gave me lotsov sweets <3

Ohyeah I saw Peeta at math tuition again!! I thought he was pretty good-looking but he turned out to be pimply :6 Which reminds me, Gecko-Boy was surprisingly nice yesterday. He let me read about the Higgs Boson particle on a copy of The Economist which he found on the stand and allowed me do the page-turning! Coincidentally, he smelled like he took a bath in Aridas deodorant that day. Maybe there's a relationship. Stinky Gecko=Grumpy Gecko and Deo-Gecko=Nice Gecko?!? I'll tell my band junior to research that for her SPIRE project.

Pedophile Mozart

Harro baby readers today was a bad day >:(((

Ugh I seriously feel so mad and sad. Aren't teachers supposed to be open-minded and fair? Hairy man never fails to disappoint me over and over again. Of course, I have contemplated this problem whilst attempting to put myself in his shoes, but the fault is invariably his. First, a little info about hairy man. He's extremely particular about manners and passionate about teaching. In fact, I think that he teaches fairly well but the problem lies with his shallowness and prejudices. I'll assume that he has the mentality of "teaching only those who want to learn", and he probably assumes I'm one of those who don't want to. I know I'm overly talkative in his lessons, but it's not a valid reason to just ignore me when I give my opinion regarding another situation. On the contrary, I was displaying MY passion for math! Dumb Hairyman was asking "Do you all want the pop quiz tomorrow or next week?" and I was practically screaming "TOMORROW!! TOMORROW!!" Then some other person said "next week" and Hairyman replied "Ok Monday or Thursday?" WTF If you only care about your "attentive" students then you can just send me to Thales you disgusting freak! OHNO I'm getting mad again >:(

But I admit, I overreacted a little as well. It was wrong of me to openly say "I'M MAD BECAUSE OF STUPID HAIRY CHIN!!!" to Hyun Hee while he was behind me (I only did that because I thought he went out of class). But it was kind of funny because Lockin was mouthing "BEHIND YOU BEHIIIIIINDDDDD!!" after I said that. But it can't be helped that I get extremely mad at being ignored. I think people who ignore me are the worst. I feel so invisible and forgotten whenever I get ignored. Even though I say violent things like "I'LL PUNCH PEOPLE WHO IGNORE ME", all I'll really do is wallow in my invisibility and sadness ;'( As doctor hiriluk once said, "When do people die? Not when they get shot or sick, but when they get....forgotten." No one likes to be ignored, no matter how old they are. Plus, ignoring people is considered rude too, so ya-boo-sucks to you, Mr Hypocrite! OMG I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore. I started this post with the intention of expressing how sorry I am but my rage took control of me ;6 Bye baby readers

Dear Kitty,

This may be the last sane post I ever write :'( I'm at the end of my tether typing this and I think I'll snap soon! Prison camp is outwardly tolerable but it slowly eats away at my mental health. I feel so irritable and rushed every moment of the day despite having nothing to do. I've become a fidgety time bomb and it feels like I'm going to explode any second now! Oh woe begone! Is there really no escape from this hellhole? Will I ever make it out of here as complete as I was initially? This place saps my joy and strength like a gigantic leech. At the very least, I hope this cantankerous bout will end soon.

Signing off,
Anne E. Frank

Pics: Accessorizing my callused and fatigued hand.

I have nothing against National Junior College, but if I could choose my high school, I would definitely choose Ouran Academy. And I would visit the Host Club everyday.


OHO OHO :'(((( I FEEL LIKE CRYING. I'll be going back to prison in 2 hours time! And I have to choose between band and my piano practice time tomorrow HALP. Why is life so complicated!??! R.I.P I should stop being a whiny ass adolescent. OH i suddenly remembered!! I had a super bad dream last night!!! I dreamt that everyone had to go to war and while we were there a notice was posted on the notice board. It was a list of the dead bodies recovered from the battlefield!!!! It was so devastating I think alot of mah baby friends were on the list but I only vaguely remember Jolene and Ethan's name :'(( IT WAS SO SAD I DONT EVER WANT IT TO HAPPEN IN REAL LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh WOW how nice of you to book 4 hours of my Sunday and lead me on to think that we were going for a movie when in actual fact you were going to send me to some dumb f0cking Chinese cheapass musical as your replacement so that you don't have to pay for the ticket. U R N S.

URGH I seriously feel so pissed off right now I'm obviously NOT going for some dumb shitty play which I most probably won't understand. What da h3ll I'm basically drowning in homework right now so I won't have 4 hours to spare. Unless we are going to watch the Amazing Spiderman, which we are not.

Anyway band was o-Kay today. A new junior joined band and she seems rather nice except for the fact that she smells like egg yolk. Seriously, if you know you stink, PLEASE USE DEODORANT. Bring stinky is perfectly excusable at this age but not using deodorant is NOT. Especially disgusting jockey boys like Stinky Gecko boy.

OMG I'm sorry for being so mean today. I M JUST SUPER ANGRY AT MAH DUMBASS SISSY WHO TRIED TO SEND ME FOR CHINESE CRAP. ON A SUNDAY. DURRRR

HALP. I think I'm becoming one of those annoying gurls who go "Omgg he looks so hot I totally lyke him!!!" when a good looking guy appears. Except that I dont say it aloud and the above thought just runs through my mind. Briefly. YECH GROWING UP SUX.

Nice rejuvenating pictures for mental tranquility:

Do, a deer, a female deer!
Re, a midget from 06!
Me, a genius from class 08!
Faaaaaaaaaafafafafafafaaaaa
*Hum rest of song*

Do YOU have what it takes to join the robot club?!?!?

Doyouwantojointherobotclub.doyouwanttojointherobotclub. Doyouwanttojointherobotclub.

Quote of the day: "Grey's Anatomy over-glamorizes the life of a doctor. You don't really get to have sex with all your nurses in the operating room."

Today was career's fair!!! Went for medical talk and got lots of freebies from dumb boring people!! LOL I feel like one of those blogshop owners who post pictures of their purchases and caption them with "MaH L0otS~~". YAAAAAAAWWWWW I FEEL SO SLEEPY NOW.

I wanted to blog bout everything but I was too busy watching some weird movie so too bad too sad you'll have to wait till I'm out of prison dear babies <3

YOYOYO MAH BABIES!!!!! HALP PLEASE SAVE ME FROM THIS HELLHOLE AKA PRISON CAMP!!!!! I SWEAR, THIS PLACE IS RUN BY NEO-NAZIS!!!! Did you know that women P.O.Ws have to weave straw baskets and make dumb stuff to ensure that they don't get bayonetted?!? NO??!?! WELL NOW YOU DO.

Yaaaaaw We performed at Esplanade last Saturday, 7July! It was my first ever performance <3 But we embarrassed Leira S Gnow and didn't follow her baton so she had to follow us instead. It was quite obvious, but what can I say? The karma police finally caught up to her. As Kiran would say, "Karma's a bitch". :P

The whole of today was fun but I'm too lazy to write about it! Here are a few pictures!!

Friendship bracelet made by ME, fat boy whom both me and Jolene took a photo of, everyone poops hoodie and my new APERTURE SCIENCE SHIRT!!!

OMG I just arrived back to my prison cell!!! Night cycling was fun but so tiring!!!!! I wobbled alot and cycled into a grass pit in the beginning, but fortunately I didn't get any injuries!! :9 After that I got used to the bike and started zooming everywhere!!! ZOOM ZOOOOOOM. I even raced with Joshua 6183619392 times!!!!

Dearest baby readers, I'm sorry I haven't posted in 9999754397 years!!!! But you can't blame me entirely. In army camp, we are subjected to several kinds of torture, the most painful of which is boredom. Followed by a long period of pain and fatigue known as study prep. If you look below, you can see a picture of a stressed inmate on the verge of breaking down. Even now, I am risking my life to type this on my blog for all mah dear baby readers. R.I.P.

Today's band practice was the WORST in the history of worst band practices. I sat next to Lionel as usual. But unlike usual circumstances, he smelled. Not of a sweet aromatic fragrance, but more of a sweaty plasticine 3-day-old-laundry smell, capable of causing nostril hairs to commit nostril hairicide. I'm not lying, it was even worse than when a flashy woman who soaked her body in perfume walked past me, causing me to nearly faint. Lionel's sweat was suffocating. I choked several times and had to turn my head 107 degrees to the right to avoid dying of asphyxiation. Fortunately he moved away. The end. Oh wait it's not the end!!! Leira S Gnow seriously sux!!!!! She thinks that I'm a lousy ass clarinet player!! WELL EXCUSE YOU ITS NOT MY FAULT YOU'RE PREJUDICED AGAINST FEMALES YOU FAT COW. I seriously CANNOT stand her!! Well actually I feel quite sad. Her words are always so cutting. I know she's too uneducated to choose her words properly and she speaks without thinking but I wish she would stop being so mean. I hate people who are mean. >:( If I were a dictator I would gather all the mean people on earth and throw them into a giant bonfire in Chernobyl. That way, if they survive, they will still be deformed for lyfe!!!! HEEEEHEEEEEEEEEEEE

OHYEAH!! BREAKING NEWS. When I returned to my cell after band, I found my underwear drawer open!!! I suspect the matron is a pervert.

I'm too lazy to talk about anything else. Oh And I will be going on a nighttime adventure set in the wild and untamed landscape of the great forest of Zimbabwe, so I probably won't get the chance to post as bandwidth and Singtel's reception bounces off palm leaves which are aplenty in Zimbabwean forests. So, goodbye, and please keep yourselves safe from panty-loving matrons.

OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE I SURVIVED THE FURST DAY OF ARMY CAMP!!!

But of course I did. I brought mah drugs afterall.

Anyway there was super dumb fire drill at 8.32pm today!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was a waste of time! Fortunately, I brought ethan's book to the parade square and managed to read 8 pages. Supper was very yummy today! Red bean bun. Actually I hate those slimy red bean soup mixtures but I love red bean paste. Some people are so dumb obviously I know that 豆沙 is made of red beans right?! Dumb455.

Yaaaaawww I'm suuuuuper bored and tired. YAY I'm going home tomorrow!! Even though I'll probably be missing delicious western food, I would rather eat home-cooked food than a small tub of paddlepop ice cream and fish fillet!! OHNO I MADE MYSLEF HUNGRY!!!!

Disclaimer: I didn't really bring drugs to army camp so don't be a little dipshit and report me to the housemaster.

I feel sorry for you. Not to be a bitch but it must suck to be you :6

HELP I THINK IM BECOMING CRABBIER AND CRABBIER. And it's because of boarding >:( I feel so emotional and overly sensitive nowadays :'( OMG I'll miss mah baby Lego!!! HEEHEE I Sound like those dumb gurls on their period. Note: NORMAL girls don't "feel like killing people" or "eat tubs of ice cream" when they're on their period!! Only attention seeking gurls write that nonsense on their Facebook.

BAAWWWWLWLLL I HONESLY FEEL A SENSE OF TREPIDATION AND FEAR!!! Have I always been this reluctant to leave for boarding?!? I still have so many things to do at home!!!

OMG I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT MEAN AND HORRIBLE STUFF!!!! I might have to change the name of this blog to www.yunisedawitchybitch.blogspot.com soon........