Mood of the day: DEPRESSED
Colour of the day: BLACK, EMO GOTHIC BLACK.
ARGH TODAY WAS A BAD DAY (ok science day was sort of fun and interesting BUT THAT IS NOT THE FOCUS HERE). It's been a long time since I said that, I know. But marks checking ended today, and I'm finally going to talk about my marks. One word: BAD. The only modules that I did well in are MI, Math, and LA401E :'( Ughhhhh I feel like crying when I think about my sciences..................IT'S JUST TRAGIC!!!! Well my GRADES arent that bad, but I know I'm getting worse and worse at everything.......there's no way to explain it, I guess it's just this uneasy gut feeling? I feel that I'm slowly getting lost and the gaps in my knowledge are getting wider and wider. To be honest, I'm scared. All around me, everyone is improving, and I'm afraid that I'll be left behind with nothing at all, not even my self-professed title of professor to comfort myself. I feel like...........a failure. Yes, it sounds really dramatic and all, but I really feel that way. It's all because of the stupid bio paper. Biology..... I used to love it but I dislike it now. My grade for the final test was a crapass piece of shit, and what's ironic is that I actually spent the most time studying for it. Sigh, I can't imagine how next semester will be like........
Anyway, I told my parents my marks and they said it's o-kay as long as I did my best. I'm thankful for my parents; they don't scold me whenever I come home with shitty grades because they understand that the mental torture I subject myself to is painful enough.
On a lighter note............THERE IS NO LIGHTER NOTE!!!!!! Melancholy is like a chronic disease that is as infectious as stupidity. All of you better watch out and stay away from me if you don't want to catch stupidicitis. Run.....run...........RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok bye gonna lie on my bed and wallow in self-pity like a little shit. Hopefully, tomorrow I will be able to muster up enough courage to get over being such a failure in life.
